evening

today i was walking into croydon and a thought crossed my mind. a thought i have had many times. i live in suburbia - the place that loads of people hate. i actually quite like it, i like the birds and the trees and the parks and the quiet and when autumn comes and the gold leaves scatter on the floor and i also like being close to the city, but mainly i like suburbia because something about it is charmingly rural. this is part of the reason that i love the countryside so much, i think of it as being like suburbia. (opposite my house there is a stables, a park with a tree garden with trees from all over the world, at the top of the main road there is a pond with ducks, coots and moorhens, with another park etc etc etc) i applied for university in falmouth thinking that i would submerge myself into a sea of parks and lanes and paths and birds and hedgehogs, badgers, all of that nonsense. i thought of it as being like my suburban heaven but even better. i think this was also influenced by the beautiful county of norfolk - of which things are like this. maybe less parks but still paths and trees and wildlife and ponds. however when i arrived in falmouth it was not like this at all. yes i went on walks and found certain things, but this was normally as a result of getting lost on my pre-planned routes due to the terrible upkeep of footpaths etc. anyway what i am trying to say is that i think suburbia is fantastic, end of story.

whilst in my suburban heaven today i felt the first chill of winter, which is a landmark for me. autumn is my favourite season, and as i noted yesterday at 8:20pm, the nights are drawing in. combine this with my first chill and...hey presto! autumn is starting to get it's long spindly fingers (i imagine they look like thin bare branches) around us, and is slowly creeping in on us. i can think of nothing better. bonfires, scarves, coats, jumpers! it's truly a divine part of year from my eyes.

one of the main aspects of the autumn is fireworks night, which by that point i have probably fallen for some girl, so combine those new feelings with the crunch of autumn under my feet, and then put it all in one evening where we both stand together (in the olden days) and look at fireworks, with a bonfire, afraid of the fireworks (me) but also the connotations they show about these new feelings i have. in Lebanon we bought some fireworks and set them off (obviously). the first evening was the scary evening, because nothing was syncronised, a firework could erupt at any moment, and i was back there (in both ways) with the pretty girl and the fear, which was confusing and from both sides. the second evening was smooth and planned, which gave me less fear, and said something to me about the future.

anyway - roll on autumn, give me all you've got, i've been practicing this time.